Sunday afternoon. What should be a relaxing pajama day or a few hours out for a drive is currently way to stressful. I need a job, I really am aware of that but I just can’t bring myself to be that worried. I want to travel next year, I want to go to university, I want to buy what I want. Yet here I am. Too anxious about both not having a job and the idea of actually getting one. I applied some places, got turned down or no response. That’s concerning to me but I have also never been so relieved. We live in a time where students need to get jobs, especially ones going into their senior year. I want one so bad but I’m not sure, my mind is a cluttered and strange place. I’m not exactly sure what the problem is but something is clearly wrong. So that’s how my day is going. Attempting to stay calm via chill music but in reality I’m so distressed it’s ridiculous.